Looks like Dwight K. Schrute is just a heartbeet away from the Oval Office.

Rainn Wilson appeared on The Tonight Show Wednesday, reading a letter from his Dunder-Mifflin alter ego accepting presumptive Republican presidential nominee John McCain's televised offer to become his running mate.

As it is, JFK's legacy can rest easy—the McCain/Schrute '08 ticket won't come to pass after the fictional car-flipper asks what he can do for his country, but only after the country asks what it can do for him.

Fortunately, he has handily provided it with an itemized list of demands. (A vote for Schrute is a vote for efficiency.)

Well, at least if the nation's already going to hell in a handbasket, we can take comfort in knowing it'll be lined with the finest 8½-by-11 card stock Scranton has to offer. The disenfranchised never had it so bad.